Close to a decade ago, when I was teaching yoga full-time…
I wrote a list of ten ways I could cultivate an internal environment of serenity and gratitude. I titled that list the Ten Hues of Practice and used it as my class theme for the week.
Just a month or so ago my mother sent me a picture of the list posted on her office bulletin board. I was both touched, that she had printed and saved it, and grateful, to be reminded of the nuggets of inspiration. I wanted to share this list with you along with musings and questions you might ask yourself while contemplating the Ten Hues of Practice.
I hope these reminders support you today, tomorrow, and into the new year.
1. Find the sacred in the mundane
What mundane task can you assign as a mindfulness practice for the week?
Just as we may get on our yoga mat or meditation pillow to intentionally be mindful of our body and breath, we can approach other daily activities as part of an embodiment practice. In this way, guiding ourselves back to presence in parts of our life where we may otherwise check out.
2. Embrace discomfort as much as comfort.
Where do you have chronic pain? Can you sit with that discomfort for five-minutes every day this week and ask your body what it wants you to know or pay attention to?
Culturally, it is normal to identify pain as bad and wrong. Yet, I have found physical discomfort to be a guide; sharing valuable information with me. Particularly chronic pain. You might notice this yourself: when you are rested, or emotionally have been able to process some grief, or had a really balanced day of work and play, your chronic aches are diminished or eliminated altogether. Pain is typically a guiding light and attention is the first step in getting clearer about what the message is.
3. The guru is the teaching, not the teacher.
Is there a person you place on a pedestal and consider as all-knowing?
Are you open to receiving their message as just that, a message; one that you can take what you like from and leave the rest? I find this important for me personally as a life-long student and as a facilitator of healing. I have to remind myself of the great wisdom living equally within beloved teachers, my beloved self, and beloved clients. All of us are on the playing field, equal in partnership.
4. Start with the relationship to self, then extend out toward others.
Is there one thing you repeatedly do in your relationships that reflects how you treat yourself?
Can you bring that attitude or behavior into a self-compassion practice? One of my defenses of character is perfectionism. Expecting perfection from others and from myself. When I notice my perfectionism I make an effort to pivot my attention to my inner life and provide compassionate focus on the parts of me that push for perfection in order to feel safe. In this way, doing the work on the inside before trying to transform my behaviors with or attitudes toward others.
5. Remind ourselves we are a child of a benevolent, loving universe.
Do you have a sense of a loving presence in your life?
What is it for you: nature, the wind, the ocean, a spirit guide, science? For me, my sense of a loving universe has and continues to evolve. I once didn’t know what I believed in. At another point in my life, art was my spiritual practice and creative inspiration was a kind of benevolent force moving through me. Today I have images in my mind of spirit guides that bring me comfort and help me tap into a feeling of being unconditionally loved.
6. Give thanks for what doesn’t go our way.
What is one example when something in your life did not go as planned but ended with an unexpectedly positive outcome?
I think the above question stands alone. If you are inspired, please feel free to share your story with me in the blog comments!
7. Make space for our imperfections.
Are there aspects of yourself that you consider shortcomings, what are they? How have they served you?
I was raised in a pretty chaotic environment as a child with a neglectful, alcoholic father. When I was nineteen-years-old all of my unprocessed trauma came raging to the surface. With no resources or supports to address these experiences, I turned to binge/over-eating. At that time, using food as my resource was the only way I could dampen the intensity of body sensations surfacing from past traumas. It served me until it did not. When I was ready, at age twenty-four or so, I found twelve-step recovery and intensive trauma-therapy for my addictive behaviors around food. In retrospect, I see how those imperfections were sparing me immense nervous system overwhelm. Once a new resource presented itself, I was able to replace the harmful behavior with supportive, loving, and self-nurturing behavior. Our imperfections are there to serve a purpose, they are not bad or wrong, they are a strategy to meet a need and an expression often of us doing the best we can with what we have.
8. Watch our judgments and question the accuracy of the thoughts.
Is there a looping thought you are stuck in that you can spend five-minutes today journaling about?
Perhaps, write down the judgmental phrase (what I call a garbage thought) and then contradict that with a loving phrase (what I call a garden thought).
There is something about putting pen to paper that can help to interrupt that looping. The practice of contradicting the thought (and writing it down) provides even more pause and can create a kind of softening inside the body-mind.
9. Explore new approaches to old problems.
What challenges do you find yourself approaching with the same ineffective strategy? Can you first give yourself compassion for doing your best? And, without expectation of the outcome, can you be open to receiving inspiration for a new way of approaching the old problem?
This one is personally a tough one. Habits are so hard to break (I think we can all agree on that). And, what I have found to be most effective is to precede new action with love, acceptance, and openness. With a willingness to receive inspiration vs trying to fix the problem.
10. Play daily, just because.
What is one way you can play today? Is it hard for you to play? How might you make play easier or safer for you to engage in?
As a trauma survivor and adult child of an alcoholic parent, I know how hard it is to let go and be silly. Trauma can make it really challenging to feel safe with the unknown. So, I want to say to those of you who can relate to that… I understand. For me, creating boundaries around play helps my nervous system recognize the activity as safe. For example, I consider surfing one activity that meets my need for play. When I am surfing I have a sense of the beginning, middle, and end while simultaneously feeling free and fluid (pun intended!). As well, I will give myself permission to move back into a more stoic, serious, calm, or focused place when I am done playing.
I would love to hear your responses.
If you feel inspired to share, please do so in the blog comment section!
Hoping you have space to nurture what brings you joy this season and wishing you a new year full of grace.
With Reverence,
Jahara Sara
*Blog post image credit: Sharon McCutcheon